Relationships in mental health
Feeling valued, safe and free to express oneself with another has no price attached and most often we will form our first important friendships in childhood. Learning that it is a two way process where both parties benefit from it can help to form internal frameworks for future friendships/relationships.
Our families can guide us with social rules, cues and safety. However being 'out there' from an early age is crucial to forge long lasting relationships in later life. Stepping away from family and total dependence can be scary and feel risky but ultimately it lays the pathway for our development - both mistakes and successes.
WITHIN THE MENTAL HEALTH CARE SYSTEM as an adult facing support from a team of different professionals, it may feel confusing, frightening or just plain unfamiliar at first. There is no guidance or rule book on how to navigate the way to becoming the healthiest we can be by getting what we need from the mental health team.
LIVED EXPERIENCE and working as a support person has taught me the following:
1) Listening actively is a huge key factor to establishing the basis for good communication
2) Asking about which support is on offer to you can open doors to groups, workshops and helpful courses
3) Talking about how you are: feelings, thoughts and functionality can be painful but by discussing it, relief may follow, like getting a heavy weight off your chest
4) Realising that you are not the 'condition' if one is diagnosed, but that you remain 'yourself' while coping with difficulties that may even be unbearable at times.
5) There are many significant words thrown around like 'recovery', 'rehab', 'healing' and 'acceptance'. Finding the right words to express your personal struggle may take time, self reflection and digging deep into the self for what feels like a 'just' description of your lived experience.
Professionals you may meet on your journey include; a G.P., a psychiatrist, a community nurse, a mental health practitioner and a counsellor or psychologist. Sometimes it may feel like a miss match, as you may be up for talking but still on a waiting list to see a talking therapist or you might have questions about side effects but cannot get an appointment. Positive relationships if established cannot be free of these constraints.
Personally, after having had a positive experience with the staff team who supported me during a crisis, it made it apparent to me that previous mental health support had been lacking.
What does positive communication look like within the system? A fair assessment of needs and requirements with referrals and suggestions felt like a good direction for me.
The advantages of groups, organisations and workshops cannot be overstated as you may well find that, if anything has been lacking, the missing piece of knowledge that fits with you or scope for more questions can be found.
Relationships in general and with mental health teams although different should have the same principles - trust, openness, honesty and a sense of fairness.
Paula Smith
